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Hip and Homeless

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Potter Royale: Prologue

     Everyone, well, everyone who has read Hogwarts: A History, anyway, knows that Phineas Nigellus was one of the worst headmasters in the history of Hogwarts.1 What fewer, well, fewer than the small group of industrious students who have actually read Hogwarts: A History, know is why. Why Phineas Nigellus is possibly the worst headmaster known to Hogwarts' history is quite a longer story than simply the statment that he was. Why Phineas Nigellus is the worst headmaster ever, in the history of wizarding schools,TM is a little something we have come to refer to as Potter Royale.

     Potter Royale was an "educational experiment" not only in magical theory but also in human behavior.2 Was it possible to isolate students, both present and future, from the same year in a setting outside time in order to test both their magical inventiveness and their "basely Muggle survivalist desire"?3 The answer, if one happens to be Phineas Nigellus, is yes. Not many wizards have been able to positively deduce by what means Nigellus succeeded in his task, but most agree it very most likely involved the highly difficult 'tempus separatum' charm, which some magical theorists have classified as "mast derf (most difficult),"4 and others "sheerly theoretical,"5 as well as a complex runic and arithmantic matrix.6 We could devote much more space to this particular problem, but instead we humbly recommend several tomes by wizards more knowledgeable than ourselves: confer the books cited in notes four through six, as well as Phineas Nigellus: Madman or Genius?, a more recent and very interesting biography by the cavalier, if not slightly misguided, Vesta Rowlands-Grimsby.

     1 Hogwarts: A History
     2 Herbert Burke, ed., The Memoirs of Phineas Nigellus (London: Libra Genora, 1939) 271.
     3 ibid. 278
     4 Ronaldus Dextra, Usen ant Aplien Chirme a Nigromancye reprint (Cambridge: Cor Leonis, 1743) 563.
     5 James Culler, A New Theory and Application of Charms in the Magical World (Edinboro: Thistle Loch, 1832) 984.
     6 Rhombus Lievneski, A Treatise on the Interplay of Runes and Arithmancy (Prague: Gens Abaca, 1906) 63. Readers interested in the arithmancy and runes work of Nigellus' experiment should also consult the standard Numeri Magici by Quintus Clodius Cogitus, Walpurga Nacht's very thorough Kenaz or Mannaz?: The Meanings, Uses, and Theory of Runes, as well as Accounting for the Unexpected: How and Why Runes Interact with Arithmancy by Adrienne Gilman Oates and Nikolai Mikhaelovitch Arkadi.

That is what I did today in my english class. I had a shamefully good time making up the bibliographical data of the books I'd crossreferenced. I feel it ends sort of abruptly, so maybe you have some suggestions? Actually, any suggestions would be fantastic.
Tags: a rare moment of productivity, fic, potter royale

  • (no subject)

    Okay. Not that PR is ever going to happen before 'Spamalot', but I thought if we were still gonna go with Phineus being the person…

  • (no subject)

    I did indeed post this in August in my own journal, I feel that it serves our purposes better here...and with minor updates! :O Cast Harry Potter…

  • It Takes Two To Tumble

    OK, so I'm still playing around with Photoshop, and now I've made a possible Potter Royale header and also a PR logo. Ok, so this is the possible…

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